Fazed–May 3, 2013
What phase am I in? Shock–wearing off? wearing on? Wearing thin, so the light gets in? What phase am I in? One month in weeks, four weeks tonight, after midnight, my birthday, by the way, Saturday May 4. Not ready for that. Done it all before? Every Saturday, and then, every Sunday, when we all met at the Starry Plough.
Then, Monday May 6, the 1 month echo, the date, so weird and difficult. Janet said it has been two years since her husband died, she still cries, and she is so sad for me, too. The body responds to grief and gives us a firewall–How? It comes in waves, recovery, sleep, burning off grief in bursts of manic housecleaning and work.
Go into the light, Steve